Community Voices - March 9, 2026

This column arrives shortly after the month we know as Black History Month. I am writing to remember BJ Richards as these “history month” conversations were a lifelong curiosity for us both.

BJ Richards founded “BJ’s Kids,” a child care center in New York City in 1977. She and I became friends not long after that when I taught in a St. Louis school with her sister in 1978. I heard many stories of BJ’s Kids and would soon make a path to know BJ Richards, the founder. Over time we shared teacher resources, ideas, frustrations and the belief that early childhood classroom life was a way to a better world.

BJ Richards was also a guest in my Early Childhood courses during the latter years of her life. She passed away in June 2024 after many years of decline in health. During that time, I collected snapshots of her daily life with children from her, the parents of children and the children themselves with the hope of writing a book about her or at the very least, an article. Alas, the long interviews we had planned were not able to happen in person as we hoped, and so, I now conduct them in my imagination for inspiration from time to time. At this time of year, and in particular, this year, 2026, they are particularly present for me.

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Back in 2020, educators and parents were bombarded with images of the pandemic, white supremacy, death, and hate. Many educators and parents felt the need to inform and protect young children and talk to them about what was happening. There was also a sense of guilt from white middle-class families and educators that they had been blind or turned the other way when it came to anti-bias/anti-racist work. The parents and educators also discovered that they had a lot of unlearning to do themselves and did not want to make the same mistakes they had seen their elders make. Many Black and Brown people have always had to face this with their children and have had to make hard choices on when to talk about race, what to do when approached by police, and how much to share about white supremacy, best known in the Black community as “The Talk.” Some white people hadn’t had much time to practice how to talk to their kids about race before 2020 and the George Floyd murder. Educators and parents took their children to protests, making signs about police brutality, defunding the police, and Black Lives Matter.

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Active listening is different from hearing. Hearing is simply one of the five senses, whereas listening is an acquirable skill. It is one of the greatest assets a leader can possess. I began my career in post-secondary education as an English Language Arts teacher. I was an empathetic teacher that many students would turn to for advice and guidance. At the time I did not realize that I was using active listening skills to encourage students to share their experience with me. I was doing what came naturally to me as a mother and an educator.

Ten years ago, I transitioned to an administrative role in an Early Childhood setting. I had learned through my education and experience how to relate to children of all ages, but what I had not been prepared for was how to relate to adults. The administrative role turned into a supervisory role as an assistant director and before I was ready, I was a director. It pains me to admit that all my practice in active listening went right out the door when I began in this position. I was so concerned with learning the regulations, operating the center, and providing quality care that I lost focus on the wellbeing of the education staff. I reflect on the times that staff tried to call off, and I questioned them, which I now realize made them feel pressured to come to work. I was so concerned with ratios and keeping classrooms open that I let the quality of care invested in the teachers decline. It did not help that I held everyone to the same standard as I held myself. I was working fifty plus hours a week, some days open to close. I did not comprehend why the teachers were resistant to doing the same. I was known for saying, “There isn’t any job I’m not willing to do,” so I felt everyone else should also be willing to fill in when and where needed.

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